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DOUBLE N

by Stevenn Beck

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1.
I don't know (what I'm doing these days) (c) by stevenn beck I don't know (what I'm doing these days I play with my time I sleep in the rain I don't know what I'm doing these days but I know that I have to change I've never been one to dress for success I've lived for the day never looked ahead I've never been one who had to be the best but I know that I have to change working each day in my suit and tie it's hard to breath when you live a lie I need to get out in the fresh air and fly be the man that I was meant to be I know what I have to do these days rip off this tie put these papers away still there are gonna be bills to bay I know that will never change I remember laying down on the beach singing a song I wrote when I was seventeen but I was afraid to pursue my dreams now I'm older and still not free I don't know what I'm doing these days I live to survive I;'m running in place I've got to step back and plan my day I know it's time for a change I don't know (what I'm doing these days I play with my time I sleep in the rain I don't know what I'm doing these days but I know that I have to change I know that I have to change I pray that I can change...
2.
IF YOU DON'T LOVE ME (LET ME KNOW) (c) by stevenn beck don't understand why you hold on there doesn't seem to be that much to say don't understand why you hold on we're different now cause you stayed the same <chorus> if you don't love me (let me know) if you don't love me I want to go you have your reasons I don't know if you don't love me (let me know) I ask you time again to please me you smile and just turn away I've asked you time again release me why is it that you want me to stay <repeat chorus> you act as if our life was pre-arranged what I want doesn't mean a thing you say that I'm the one whose crazy now I think it's sad you'd settle for this <repeat chorus> I think of love as something more than two people living together all alone sharing a residence and children walls climbing higher and no place to go <repeat chorus> don't understand why you hold on there doesn't seem to be that much to say don't understand why you hold on we're different now cause you stayed the same <repeat chorus>
3.
MR. MARTYR SINNED (c) by STEVENN BECK I met three men by the shelter of the sea they stole away both my eyes kill all the settlers and pilgrims of the moor restore the king to his size live for the lives that have been cast away as irrelevant to the wind success ruins the dead when they meet on the last day I'm sure mr. martyr sinned the departure was late as we sat down on the shore sitting at the place sir john bled and the other men there they never said a word recalling what the wise men said that it's taken too long to do what must be done we looked back at where we'd been just ten yards off the beach jump away from the boat I'm sure mr. martyr sinned we donned red dress when we landed at the sound the thunder seemed to increase to the disbeliever's awe as we stepped into the crowd to serve the ten their final feast but where were the ten who were to have died while we all prepared their end we've failed in our task only three did not survive I'm sure mr. martyr sinned now the rain fell heavy through the ages of the night but the famine and drought remained long hours had been spent searching have the world in vain for the means to unearth the saved damn all the curs who barked at the sound of laughter cutting through the din and my memory it fails but I shall never forget I'm sure mr. martyr sinned and my memory it fails but I shall never forget I'm sure mr. martyr sinned
4.
UNDERGROUND MODE (c) by stevenn beck once upon a time you took me by the hand led me down the path to no man's land we were so young trying everything once or twice looking for ways just to have a good time steal kisses in the alley by the Five and Dime we were all right flying high into the night it was fine but out there on the docks I get a big chill my blood runs cold my heart is still seems like they all appeared one day on an empty shore thirty years to the day cry me a river full of mistakes call me a dreamer out on the make above the fray safe in underground mode well i never thought it would end up this way thousands of clones not a soul to their name on the move looking good for who knows who or why just a lifetime ago we laughed in the sun thought we were different thought we were one the generation who would save it for good we were fooling down in the cavern someone hits on my friend her eyes showed desire she moved closer again she asked what he did and he said who he was she turned on her heels disappeared in a rush give me a reason or a proper defense don't blame me for sitting alone on the fence above the fray safe in underground mode someone rapped on the door with his baseball bat cried "I'll break your head if you don't come out" I fell to the floor the intruder burst in it was my best friend with an evil grin leave me to wander alone in the streets keep me suspended at the point of release above the fray safe in underground mode I can't understand why you and I can't drop all pretension in the wink of an eye exist as ourselves in the ego-less fringes of the universe listen to the music being played in the street it all sounds the same it puts me to sleep wasn't there a time we all listened to the lines for meaning once more I pushed through the crowd at jack's back yard everyone I knew there they were laughing so hard I peered through the smoke offered my hand they looked right through me like I was some other man ain't no tomorrow ain't no yesterday keep all your sorrows just give me today ain't no tomorrow ain't no yesterday keep all your sorrow just give me today above the fray safe in underground mode above the fray safe in underground mode above the fray safe in underground mode...
5.
listening to myself (c) by stevenn beck does it make you baby does it make you isn't it a thrill for you to do me cruelly everybody has the urge to beat up on their neighbors find their weakest point push until they break <chorus> I'm doing what I can not gonna follow someone else's plan I'm being the best I can by listening to myself isn't it true we all want to make it sometime isn't it true nothing's behind your eyes is there any kindness towards the fool who is trying make yourself a star with a wicked line <repeat chorus> when we're all dust it will be irrelevant take your best shot if you want it that bad I stand tall a survivor of my lifetime nothing can harm me more than that do you see it baby do you see it isn't it a weapon you can't control is there any reason for a man with a mission achieve his destiny by destroying souls <repeat chorus>
6.
THINGS ON YOUR MIND (c) by stevenn beck the day will dawn in the morning's light the sun will rise shining bright the dusk will be in its flight the day dawns in the morning light places and faces that you could name keep moving in and through your brain you know it ain't gonna be the same with the faces that you could name <chorus> but in another time it won't be so strange events might discover a different range there ain't no way to draw the line when you think about the things on your mind the people keep following behind you don't think they're ever gonna find you they're setting their traps just to blind you those people that are following you any links between you and god along the way you might disregard it ain't too easy and it ain't too hard to sever your ties with god <repeat chorus> and the certain one you're looking for cause disappointments and the hopes they mar you just wind up in a certain bar instead of with the one you're looking for and the deep blue remains across the sky the winds will blow but never die if you think you win you only lie while the blue remains across the sky <repeat chorus>
7.
IF YOU CAN'T PLEASE ME (c) by stevenn beck <chorus> if you can't please me I will have to lock you out of my life if you can't please me I will have to work it out alone this time when we meet to share some time I supply the verbal lines you laugh if you feel right or not I feel like I'm on the stage spotlight cuts through smoky haze just another job these days I've got <repeat chorus> so much of my time has been spent on other lives causing me to wonder why I'm here I have to try to make the move sublimate my own mood don't want to come off seeming rude or weird <repeat chorus> I'd like to think that I can communicate Let you come inside my mind I'd like to think I can articulate let you know what drives me wild maybe it wasn't meant that I get what I want but sometimes I need to fulfill my needs if I continue to please everyone resentment will explode inside of me <repeat chorus> if you can't please me if you can't please me if you can't please me if you can't please me...
8.
THE BOSS OF DOWNTOWN (c) by stevenn beck every city block has a rap like that in downtown stainless streaks of premature release in downtown you're dancing in the street with the total obsession of a pimp to his partner or a shrink to his session we heard it from the source you've just been named the boss of downtown all the money in the world can't keep the flags unfurled in downtown with a little on the side you can't resist the high of downtown you've stretched the law's borders across seven generations with some high-tech silver your own manipulation we heard it from the source you've just been named the boss of downtown just modern machines taking bitter heat right to the streets seemed like a beautiful sight when the lights tripped into the breeze beautiful people creating their own little universe infesting the rats in the sewers with their own curse in the summer there's no longer room to run in downtown the upscale palefaces pounding the nails in downtown where surviving the fittest is the grim situation unwashing the masses latest depreciation we heard it from the source you've just been named the boss of downtown there's a south street freeze rocking the rabble in the road no place to hide as they all moved where they're told hot blooded boys drowning quickly in white quicksand carpetbaggers all waving their magic bands every city block has a rap like that in downtown stainless streaks of premature release in downtown you're dancing in the street with the total obsession of a pimp to his partner or a shrink to his session we heard it from the source you've just been named the boss of downtown
9.
Magic Man 03:32
MAGIC MAN (c) by stevenn beck look out for the magic man he's got the magic cure he's got the midas touch the mighty lion roars he paves the street with gold professes to be pure he's got you where he wants you look out for the jingle man who sings the clever tune underneath the melody lays the voice of doom his sweet exterior sure brightens up a room he's got you where he wants you look out for the mystery man whose eyes you never see beware of the crafty hand whose tricks are up his sleeve just cause I ain't paranoid don't mean that he'll spare me he's got me where he wants me I know you can't believe that I know what will come but I can't resist telling it to you I'm kinda jaded and I'm no longer young still I'll warn you if you listen keep away from that magician now look out for the future man who says the past is now look out for the pleasant voice who scares you when he growls don't forget you have the power to stop him on the prowl or he'll have you where he wants you he'll have you where he wants you he'll have you where he wants you
10.
just desserts (c) by stevenn beck everybody gets what they deserve no matter how long it takes everybody gets what they deserve may happen too soon may happen too late I don't take any pleasure from it the painful end to an old friendship everybody gets what they deserve getting their just desserts everyone gets just what they need even from someone else everyone taking a little piece even at someone else's expense you always tried to come up with the line that made you feel satisfied everybody gets what they deserve getting their just desserts you spent a lifetime looking down you were better than anyone but you never got off the ground you were out of touch out of time all done everybody dodging bullets again hoping they're for someone else no one taking a stand or two unless it's to stand up for themselves it's hard for me to comprehend the sight of you struggling to do anything right everyone dodging bullets again getting their just desserts you started out as number one you had it all planned in advance you advertise your skills in spiegels but you lost your way you lost your place you lost your chance everybody gets what they deserve no matter how long it takes what goes around comes around no matter how much we all feel safe I don't take any pleasure in it cause it's something you had every right to expect everybody gets what they deserve getting their just desserts everybody gets what they deserve getting their just desserts
11.
Epic Time 03:23
EPIC TIME © by stevenn beck where has it gone the hope we all share where has it gone the dreams we all dared where has it gone the burden we all bared and how did that epic time slip away? why have we lost all that we did endure why have we lost motives that once were pure why do we sit and wait here so safe and secure and how did that epic time slip away? time used to be so easy to define but now they've all confused my mind the pieces they have failed to fall we just can't penetrate their wall we struggled so hard but rarely did we gain maybe now we've come to expect that killing rain it seems to have gone for good that's what they say and how did that epic time slip away?
12.
TOO MANY PEOPLE (c) by stevenn beck all the people I meet these days are crazy some are losers some are users living in the past they're lazy they take what they need steal what they want always playing a part too many people... all the people I see these days are faking unaware of their own inner fears it's so frustrating lack of insight is like the plague raining on our parade too many people... I'm so tired of playing politics living dreams no man could sustain like the hunter after the season success isn't worth the pain all the people I see these days are playing no control over their own souls it's so degrading they complain no one communicates but they hide behind their own face too many people... I've been trying to maintain my innocence but I fear that it's gone for good I'm just done climbing a mountain only to discover it's moved all the people I see these days are leaving no desire to rekindle the fires of youthful dreaming turning away from humility every time they change their street too many people... too many people... too many people...
13.
(MONEY) CAN BUY ME LOVE (c) by stevenn beck saturday night I met you at eight sheik little club on the upper west side you said you had something heavy to discuss you leave your brownstone I take my train we meet amidst the chaos of the faster lane and you lay it on the line with a flick of the brush you say "love can't buy me money but money can buy me love love can't buy me money it's not that you're not good enough" captain love and sal were stepping out invited me out for a saturday night so I blow dry my hair just to get it right enter a club where the rocks were hot brooks brothers babies all holding court with smiles that said lights out for the right price they said "love can't buy us money but money can buy us love love can't buy us money it's not that you're not good enough" quarter-to-three another subway ride home coming down from the upper west side with my body intact but my mind turned upside down he held out his hand for a piece of piece of the pie flashed me a grin and a cut-rate knife said "my good looks alone can't turn the whole thing around" he said "love can't buy me money but money can buy me love love can't buy me money it's not that you're not good enough" love can't buy me money...
14.
DO THE RIGHT THING (c) by stevenn beck troops on the front lines desperate for a lifeline fighting a war without cover of air captain holds it together requests a plan that's better only to be told do the best that he can the emporress without clothes on can't seem to get it on now she's locked into her agenda refuses to hear it doesn't seem matter her decisions are disaster when she's stripped naked there's nothing there <chorus> but you've got to do the right thing do the right thing do the right thing now morale is declining fatalities are climbing captain reports to his executive staff they don't seem to listen in fact they have a vision of promotions if they keep it to themselves the fighters seem to suffer while everybody wonders why leaders only fight for the expedient cause replacements aren't coming cause the politician's running it isn't good for business if voters are lost <2nd chorus> but you've got to do the right thing do the right thing do the right thing now you've got to do the right thing baby do the right thing step up to the plate and take your bow the boss's right-hand flunky the charming Mr. Lucky does everything he can to make himself look good his subordinates are ruthless his boss remains clueless and the captains of the war are bring battered and bruised soldiers doing battle are informed they have to handle all of the problems being thrown their way the lack of ammunition can't be a prohibition they've got to get it done they've got to find some way <repeat 2nd chorus> now the crisis is approaching the structure is imploding the captain disappears cause he wouldn't play ball his conscience wouldn't let him be used by their ambition the safety of his troops was the primary call and the emporress without clothes on is guaranteed to sleep on cause nobody tells her what's gone on the numbers they are lying cause the troops continue dying and Mr. Lucky is somehow never around <repeat 2nd chorus>

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released March 1, 2013

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Stevenn Beck New York, New York

Stevenn lives in NYC and has been writing music for more than 30 years. He has performed at "Open Mike" concerts in Maryland, in Washington Square Park as well Manhattan/West Village. Stevenn is also an actor/writer, with credits in several small movies as well as in local theatre. His original retro folk-rock music can be previewed
at www.shoutcast.com/Internet-Radio/stevenn%20bec
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